Ring in the New Year with FE Feeley Jr -

New Years Writing Resolutions

Hi and Happy New Year. My name is F.E. Feeley Jr and I am the author of The Haunting of Timber Manor and the soon to be released, Objects in the Rear View Mirror.

 

I guess one of the things that I need to change or make sure to pay more attention to, is patience when it comes to writing.  I have a really bad habit of letting me get ahead of myself. I’ll write a book that gets accepted for publication and then I sit down and push out another one and not pay attention to what I’m doing.  In the end, its crap and the publisher rejects it.  Then I get mad and rage over it, damning everyone in the process. Yes, I am that guy.  So, as far as resolutions go, should I ever publish again is to slow down, soak in the accomplishment and not jump right into another book thinking that golden words flow out of my fingertips.  I need to respect the entire process. So yeah, this is me apologizing for being a douche and a promise that I am gonna work at it.

The Haunting of Timber Manor

While recovering from the recent loss of his parents, Daniel Donnelly receives a phone call from his estranged aunt, who turns over control of the family fortune and estate, Timber Manor.  Though his father seemed guarded about the past, Daniel’s need for family and curiosity compel him to visit.

Located in a secluded area of the Northwest, Timber Manor has grown silent over the years. Her halls sit empty and a thin layer of dust adorns the sheet-covered furniture. When Daniel arrives to begin repairs, strange things happen.  Nightmares haunt his dreams. Memories not his own disturb his waking hours. Alive with the tragedies of the past, Timber Manor threatens to tear Daniel apart.

Sheriff Hale Davis grew up working on the manor ground. Seeing Daniel struggle, he vows to protect the young man who captured his heart, and help him solve the mystery behind the haunting and confront the past- not only to save Daniel’s life, but to save his family; whose very souls hang in the balance.

At Dreamspinner Press

You can reach me at : FACEBOOK

And you can read and comment on my blog here: FE Feeley's Blog

Fantastic heroes, some amazing loving and a happy ending are the answers you can find in The Librarian- Reviewed by Elise at Sensual Reads

All Romance     Amazon

What Not to Say #4

The Old Soda Shop 

An M/M Romance by Lee Brazil 

At All Romance eBooks! 

Former college roommates Matt and Sam have a history.

Will a chance encounter in the street lead to a second chance at love?

Years ago, art student Matt Gilray's world turned on its axis when his lover Sam rejected him at their favorite hangout. He'd spent the years since learning to be a businessman and an artist, letting go, forgetting a love affair that had brought him more pain than joy in the end.

A last minute realization that his college fuck buddy had turned into a lover wasn’t enough to stop business student Sam Balantyne from chasing his dreams. When the dreams runs out, Sam returns home and buys the derelict soda shop where they used to hang out. He wasn't looking for a second chance; he just wanted to enjoy a memory.

In the process of “freeing himself to pursue his dreams”, 

had Sam tarnished them beyond recovery?

Watching the Ball Drop with Havan Fellows

Howdy ya'll...Havan Fellows here. :) So Lee hunted me down and hip bumped me, telling me I have to make some New Year resolutions...um...so I should close the Candy Crush window right? *winks* Just kidding, I'm at the EDJ—can only get Bejeweled here. lol

Seriously though, this is the first year of the rest of my life...right? So many things I want to accomplish and so many things I feel I can't do...

Yeah, I'd kinda like to prove myself wrong.

Let's start with the "gimmes":

STORY ORGY IS BACK!!!! Every Monday, whether it is a hundred word flash, a promo for a new release (oh please lol) or a thousand word short...I will be on my blog making the most of it.

-and not to be out done-

PULP FRICTION IS BACK!!!! We gave you some kick ass men of Atlanta...what happens when we wrangle up some ass kicking men of Flagstaff? I'm not sure either...but I'll be front and center to find out. ;)

Okay—so those were the easy ones...let's delve a little deeper for the next couple of resolutions:

Anyone who knows me knows that I'm perpetually late with almost everything...I'm talking a 90/10 ratio against my good name. I'd sure like to make a resolution that I'll turn in my WIPs on time to my editor. Oh wouldn't that make her happy happy too! lol

Plus I'd like my BDSM series Secrets of the Sanctuary to maybe have a go at it this year...so far I've got two shorts for that series in the public eye: Hidden Needs (which should be edited maybe for re-release soon) and Secret Needs (a sexy little holiday short in Melting Jack Frost). I'm working on two longer stories: Forgotten Needs and Unspoken Needs, trying to get them finished and shined up.

And finally...there are two men that seem to be shouting at me now, wanting their turn in the spotlight. Over a year ago I started a book that finally got finished and published in Nov – Judging Jude. I'm really proud of this book—Lee calls Jude the anti-hero that everyone will fall in love with *squee*. Well, there are two guys who helped Jude in his trials...Wally and Doc. *looks around and leans forward to whisper* You know what? I think Wally just might like the Doc...and I'm pretty darn sure the Doc might like him back. So what's the problem? Well you know my men—nothing can be that simple. *winks*

So there you have it...*counts down the list* well crap! I've got way too many resolutions here...*heads desk* Like I don't know...five too many? lmao *hip bumps Lee back* so whatdoya say? Think you can keep me on track for another year? *big smiles* I guarantee I'll make it interesting for ya! hehe

Here's a little peekie poo at Judging Jude...guess what—it's half price at ARe right now! *winks*

Judging Jude excerpt:

Jude heard the door open.

"What's up, doc?" He laughed at his own joke.

Dr. Haims joined Jude at the window. "How're you feeling today? You got up on your own? That's good."

"Yeah, I even peed like a big boy all by myself."

"Well, it's been a couple of days. You should get up and move around by now. It's not like you were in a coma." Dr. Haims chuckled. "No matter what Billy thinks."

Jude kept his gaze trained on the silhouette of the trees and hoped he sounded nonchalant. "Is he still here?"

"Snoring on my couch as we speak."

"Doc? Can I ask you a question?"

Maybe Dr. Haims could feel Jude's insecurities, or maybe he had really good bedside manners. Either way he didn't try to face Jude or pry in any way. "You can ask anything you want. My answering, now, that's a different question."

Jude snorted solemnly. "Am I sober? I mean… two days, is that enough time for my system to clear out?"

He heard the long, deep intake of breath from the doc. "Technically, yes. For the poisons you took, they're gone from your body."

Jude continued to bore a hole through that window. "I'm lucid. It's been a long time since I've had real thoughts. I mean thoughts solely mine, not chemically induced. The headaches, the shakes, the nausea…I can handle all that. These thoughts scare the hell out of me, though.

"I can't go back home. If I do, I'll fall down the rabbit's hole again, and this time I might not get out…" 

 Available at All Romance  Amazon, Breathless Press and other fine ebook vendors! 

Best Seller? Why not?

Found the secret to writing the best seller on Pinterest a while back. Thought I'd share it with you all. Because I'm nice, that's why. 

I'll be over there...*points left* 

Writing. 

Ringing in a New Year! Pass the Pickled Herring!

My father used to gather us (my eight siblings and I) all around on New Year's Eve and we'd write out our goals, our resolutions to be read aloud. I hated it. I never knew what to say, because really, I had no desire to change myself. So every year it was all more of the same. "I'll be more active", "I'll watch less junk on television and more documentaries", "I'll lose weight".  Blah blah blah. All things that should make us realize how critical we are of ourselves and how difficult it is to be happy and productive when you're so down on yourself.

But he was adamant, so every December 31^st, we'd sit down and share these goals, and seal the deal by watching the ball in Time's Square drop at midnight whilst munching on pickled herring and crackers, black-eyed peas and ham hocks.

It seems counterproductive to me. Every year starts afresh with the promise of new things, of rewards and blessings and joy that can be had…if only we do something differently than we did the year before.

Do we really think we can be happy in the coming year, if we lose weight, exercise more, read more books, ask for a raise, find a better job? How is doing all these things that make us miserable going to make us happy?

How can we expect to be happier in a new year, if we plan to punish ourselves?

We probably can't.

I don't usually make resolutions for that reason, and a few others.

But I look around today, and I know things have to change. I have to work smarter, more efficiently, and more effectively. So, I have a few writing related resolutions for the coming year to share with you.

1.      Write 1K words a day.

2.      Keep a schedule. This is my "job". I should treat it as such.

3.      Connect with readers via the blog and FB regularly.

4.      More specifically: Revise, expand and republish Be A Bad Boy

5.      Complete projects 2 weeks ahead of schedule

There. That ought to be sufficient to start off with, huh? Meanwhile, I've coerced some of my fellow authors into sharing their resolutions for the upcoming year. Watch this space for posts from Hank Edwards, Laura Harner, Havan Fellows, Tina Marie Westbrook, F.E. Feeley Jr., Raven McAllan, Edmond Manning, Lisa Worral and more!

Bonus:

Pickled Herring for New Year's and ALL special occasions!

(Similar to my Dad's, but this one is from HERE)

INGREDIENTS

6 new or baby red potatoes (about 12 ounce)

⅛ tsp salt

8 oz pickled herring fillets (see note), drained

3 Tbsp reduced-fat sour cream

2 Tbsp finely chopped red onion

fresh dill for garnish

freshly ground pepper to taste

DIRECTIONS

1. Place a steamer basket in a large saucepan, add 1 inch of water and bring to a boil. Put potatoes in the basket and steam until barely tender when pierced with a skewer, 15 to 20 minutes, depending on size. Slice each potato into 1/4-inch-thick slices (discard the ends). Sprinkle the potato slices with salt.

2. Cut herring fillets into pieces small enough to fit on a potato slice. Place one piece of herring on each potato slice, dollop each with about 1/8 teaspoon sour cream and sprinkle with red onion. Garnish with dill and a grinding of pepper.

Note: Pickled herring are herring that have been cured in salt, rinsed and then packed in a vinegar-based marinade that can be flavored with wine, mustard, sherry or cream—any flavor will work in the recipe. Look for it in jars or tubs in the seafood department at most supermarkets.

 Available at All Romance  Amazon, Breathless Press and other fine ebook vendors! 

New EXCERPT- His Dream Lover

Got an excerpt for you from my latest release today- His Dream Lover 

This is in Totally Bound's 50's Mixed Tape Anthology

EXCERPT 

HisDream Lover

Lee Brazil

By reading any further, you are stating that you are 18 years of age, or over. If you are under the age of 18, it is necessary to exit this site.

Copyright © Lee Brazil 2014. All Rights Reserved, Total-E-Ntwined Limited, T/A Totally Bound Publishing.

“It’s my half day today.” As though having time off means you’ll be away from the hospital. Dr Oliver Gideon perched on the edge of the uncomfortable chair beside the bed in room 32B at Beachport Memorial Hospital and searched the pale face on the pillow for any sign that his words had been heard.

The night nurse had turned the patient’s face so he looked into the room. If he could see, that was. The comatose man’s eyelids remained obstinately closed after six months of long sleep. There wasn’t even a flicker of eye movement that Oliver could latch onto and pretend the patient dreamed, or merely slept. Those lids lay stubbornly still, immobile as the rest of the man.

Coma. It was supposed to have been a short-term state induced to enhance the body’s natural healing processes following Joseph Caldwell’s surgery. Instead, hours had stretched into days, and days into weeks, and still the man slumbered on, if sleep it could be called.

It didn’t matter that the patient’s eyes refused to open of their own accord. Oliver knew they were slate grey, almond-shaped and, when he was conscious, they telegraphed every emotion the man felt. Oliver knew that, because he’d stared down into those eyes on an operating table six months before, seen the interest in the grey depths turn to fear when he’d caught sight of the gas mask. Fear wasn’t unusual in his patients—he had a practiced litany of words designed to ease the uncertainties of patients who were scared of losing consciousness.

Some people feared spiders, some feared the unknown. Joseph Caldwell, he sensed, feared losing control. He was a man who was accustomed to being careful. His whole being screamed caution and reserve, from the precisely trimmed hair to the neatly plucked eyebrows. If he peeked into the plastic carrier that held the man’s belongings he would surely find a pair of highly polished dress shoes, neat slacks, a button-down shirt and a tie. Even his build was a perfect balance of casual fitness, muscled but not buff, lean but not thin.

The patient had lost muscle and fat though over the ensuing weeks. Allowing his gaze to wander down the thin frame, skipping guiltily over the IV needles and catheter tubes, Oliver counted the man’s breaths for a minute. Each breath raised the thin sheet reassuringly, establishing Caldwell’s claim to life. Persistent, tenacious, clinging to life. He might look waxen and pale, but Joseph Caldwell lived, and that was something.

It wasn’t much consolation, and Oliver felt at times that if the man had died on the operating table he might have been better able to get over the whole mess. This lingering sleep-death tugged at his heart and head, made a mess of his entire reason for being. His mother clucked at him and told him he was obsessed. He might well be. He just couldn’t forget the way trust had replaced fear in that grey gaze, the way the man had held his gaze until sleep claimed him, had clutched Oliver’s hand until his body went limp.

“I could chuck it all,” he spoke. He sipped his coffee idly and grimaced at the bitter flavour. He’d forgotten the sugar again. “And go off to become a bohemian artist. Make splashes of colour on grey landscapes and tell the world I’m just misunderstood.” The idea had come to him more and more often of late. He had come to despise his job and the science behind it. Science he felt had betrayed him. All his life he’d loved the quantifiable, the predictable. When science screwed you over what else was there but art? Draining the cup to the dregs, he swallowed the strange lump in his throat that seemed to have been a near-constant problem for the last six months.

What Not to Say #3

The Old Soda Shop 

An M/M Romance by Lee Brazil 

At All Romance eBooks! 

Former college roommates Matt and Sam have a history.

Will a chance encounter in the street lead to a second chance at love?

Years ago, art student Matt Gilray's world turned on its axis when his lover Sam rejected him at their favorite hangout. He'd spent the years since learning to be a businessman and an artist, letting go, forgetting a love affair that had brought him more pain than joy in the end.

A last minute realization that his college fuck buddy had turned into a lover wasn’t enough to stop business student Sam Balantyne from chasing his dreams. When the dreams runs out, Sam returns home and buys the derelict soda shop where they used to hang out. He wasn't looking for a second chance; he just wanted to enjoy a memory.

In the process of “freeing himself to pursue his dreams”, 

had Sam tarnished them beyond recovery?

Hank Edwards Challenged Me - Passing It on to You - Are you up for it?

Hank Edwards challenged me to name 10 Movies that have stuck with me over the years. I'm not sure I can do this one- but I'll give it a shot.

1. North and South - okay, so it was actually a miniseries about 24 hours long, but still...
2. Sound of Music - In second grade, my class took a field trip to see this movie- I've been a fan every since.
3. The Wizard of Oz - as a child, I was terrified not only that flying monkeys would swoop down from the trees and attack me, but that a house would fall on me.
4. Planet of the Apes - saw at a drive in theater with my whole family in the back end of a station wagon - it was a double feature with 2001 Space Odyssey, which bored me to sleep. Roddy McDowall as Cornelius, however, is something that I can still grin about today
5. Star Wars - Yes. I am more likely to watch this than any of the new ones. My siblings and I fought light saber battles with tree branches for years after seeing this.

NOW Moving out of the childhood years

6.  Shawshank Redemption - I'm still not sure he was innocent
7. Good Will Hunting - Because. That's why. Just Because.
8. The Dead Poet's Society - I wanted to be that teacher- the one who inspires creative thought and action. I hope I was.
9. Pulp Fiction - What just happened there? I know. It's awful...but in a really good way.
10. The Silence of the Lambs - Shudder.

What about you? Can you name ten movies that have stuck with you over the years?

M/M Series of the Year! Pulp Friction Honored

Laura Harner, Tom Webb, Havan Fellows and I were all floored to find this item in the newsfeed this morning!

Best M/M series goes to Pulp Friction authors, Lee Brazil, Havan Fellows, Laura Harner and T.A. Webb. I reviewed these books earlier this year. They have 5 each in the series for a total of 20 books in these serial shorts.
Post by Books Galore.

We are so honored that readers are enjoying our little experiment in writing, and look forward to seeing you all in Flagstaff next year- virtually, at least!

BTW- Books Galore is a fabulous Face Book page for lovers of ALL kinds of books, not just m/m. Click on over and give them a "like" today to keep abreast of all the latest and greatest.

Have you tried the Pulp Friction experience?

Pulp Friction 2013 drew to an end this month with the finale, Odd Man Out. Check it out at All Romance.

Blurb

Chance Dumont. Marcus Prater. Zachary Carmichael. Wick Templeton. Friends through circumstance, brothers by choice.

After facing off with his personal demons, Wick shuts down, but he never anticipated how his impulsive off-the-grid vacation would affect the rest of his chosen brothers. No one can hurt you like someone you love.

Before they have time to work things out, the serial killer who has been targeting Atlanta’s gay community strikes close to home. Again. It’s enough to cause an all-hands meeting at Chances Are. But when one of the brothers fails to show, it becomes clear that the close connection the men have to the murder victims is no coincidence.

They’ve got the smarts, the weapons, and the willingness to do whatever it takes to find their missing brother—before it’s too late. What brought them together in the first place may just be that which tears them apart forever.

Four authors. Twenty books. One explosive finale.

The Old Soda Shop Makes it to the Best Seller List at All Romance!

I was so thrilled to receive the email from All Romance eBooks that The Old Soda Shop had made it onto their site wide best seller list! Thank you to everyone who purchased from their site.

It's a real pleasure for an author to see their work appreciated. 

I had to take a screen shot, you know, so I could remember. 

Have you picked up a copy yet? It's a sweet, second chance at love romance with a touch of hot, sensual attraction.

Get yours today!

Christmas Gift Offer From Totally Bound

Hey Guys,

Totally Bound was cool enough to send me this gift certificate/card, with instructions to forward it to a friend or lover of erotic fiction. Well, naturally, I though of you!

Why not click over and pick up something hot today such as His Dream Lover, my latest m.m romance novella?

Merry Christmas to you!

Meet Sam...The Old Soda Shop

The Old Soda Shop 

An M/M Romance by Lee Brazil 

At All Romance eBooks! 

Former college roommates Matt and Sam have a history.

Will a chance encounter in the street lead to a second chance at love?

Years ago, art student Matt Gilray's world turned on its axis when his lover Sam rejected him at their favorite hangout. He'd spent the years since learning to be a businessman and an artist, letting go, forgetting a love affair that had brought him more pain than joy in the end.

A last minute realization that his college fuck buddy had turned into a lover wasn’t enough to stop business student Sam Balantyne from chasing his dreams. When the dreams runs out, Sam returns home and buys the derelict soda shop where they used to hang out. He wasn't looking for a second chance; he just wanted to enjoy a memory.

In the process of “freeing himself to pursue his dreams”, 

had Sam tarnished them beyond recovery?

New Release: Available for Early Download- His Dream Lover

His Dream Lover 

by 

Lee Brazil

Is available for early download now from 

 Totally Bound 

Through the gates of the sun lies the land of dreams, and beyond that...the realm of the lost.

In a private hospital room, motionless and still beneath a sheet, lies Joseph Caldwell. His surgery has passed, to all intents and purposes, successfully. The doctors offer no explanation for why he hasn't awakened from the medically induced coma. The stream of visitors trickles down to nothing, and still he lies in endless sleep. Nearly everyone has given up any hope for his recovery.

Anaesthesiologist Oliver Gideon is racked with guilt and confusion. Could he have somehow done something wrong? His superiors assure him he is not at fault, the science he reviews tells him his dosages were correct, but the longer Caldwell sleeps the more Oliver is haunted by the loneliness of the figure in the bed.  He spends every possible moment with the patient, reading, talking, trying to fill the little room with sound, to stir a response that science isn't sure is possible.

Morpheus, King of Dreams has welcomed Joseph to his realm. Some dreams, he explains, are true, and some are false. There's only one way tell. Joseph loves the dream world Morpheus has woven for him, for in it, he's found something he never found in reality—a soul mate. For the first time, his life is perfect.

In the end, he has to choose. He cannot stay in the Realm of Morpheus forever. It's either back to the land of the sun, and potential loneliness or on to the realm of the lost.

Reader Advisory: This story has been previously released as part of the 50s Mixed Tape anthology by Totally Bound.

What Not to Say #2

The Old Soda Shop 

An M/M Romance by Lee Brazil 

At All Romance eBooks! 

Former college roommates Matt and Sam have a history.

Will a chance encounter in the street lead to a second chance at love?

Years ago, art student Matt Gilray's world turned on its axis when his lover Sam rejected him at their favorite hangout. He'd spent the years since learning to be a businessman and an artist, letting go, forgetting a love affair that had brought him more pain than joy in the end.

A last minute realization that his college fuck buddy had turned into a lover wasn’t enough to stop business student Sam Balantyne from chasing his dreams. When the dreams runs out, Sam returns home and buys the derelict soda shop where they used to hang out. He wasn't looking for a second chance; he just wanted to enjoy a memory.

In the process of “freeing himself to pursue his dreams”, 

had Sam tarnished them beyond recovery?

New Review: Rainbow Reviews Reviews Donovan's Deal

Rainbow Book Reviews gives  Donovan's deal (Truth or Dare Series, Book 6) a great review.

"....Thank you, Lee, for the reminder that a house husband doesn't sit around eating bonbons all day...."

Read More at 

http://www.rainbowbookreviews.com/book-reviews/donovans-deal-truth-or-dare-6-by-lee-brazil-at-breathless-press

Get your copy of this novella at 

Breathless Press 

for 20% off! 

New Excerpt : The Old Soda Shop

The Old Soda Shop 

At All Romance eBooks! 

Former college roommates Matt and Sam have a history.

Will a chance encounter in the street lead to a second chance at love?

Years ago, art student Matt Gilray's world turned on its axis when his lover Sam rejected him at their favorite hangout. He'd spent the years since learning to be a businessman and an artist, letting go, forgetting a love affair that had brought him more pain than joy in the end.

A last minute realization that his college fuck buddy had turned into a lover wasn’t enough to stop business student Sam Balantyne from chasing his dreams. When the dreams runs out, Sam returns home and buys the derelict soda shop where they used to hang out. He wasn't looking for a second chance; he just wanted to enjoy a memory.

In the process of “freeing himself to pursue his dreams”, had Sam tarnished them beyond recovery?

EXCERPT 

Chapter 1

Sam Balantyne trudged down the slushy sidewalk of the historic district of Greely, Colorado, gazing unseeing into the falling slush. The gray sky suited his mood. Very few people were foolish enough to be out walking in this mess. Most people had the sense to be at home or somewhere warm. Not Sam. No, thanks to his flaky, thoughtless sexy roommate, he walked down an icy street in a part of town where even bikes were frowned upon just off campus. It was safe enough not to look. No random cars would splash murky water on unwary pedestrians. No cars were permitted on the brick work streets of Old Town.

Sam knew where he was going and exactly how many steps in the icy slush it would take to get there. An hour ago, he’d been contentedly lounging on his bed, studying for midterms next week, when his flighty roommate called. He curled his hands into fists inside the deep pockets of his navy wool pea coat. Fucking Matt. Such a goddamn pie-in-the-sky dreamer. How did I end up with an art student for a roommate in the first place? Every month turned into a damn race against the clock to see if Matt would be able to pull together his share of the rent, or the cable, or whatever. Bad enough that Sam perpetually fed the man, now this.

Apparently Matt had gotten the rent money but couldn’t be bothered to come home and give it to Sam. No. Sam had to meet him at the soda shop off Fifth Street because Matt had other things to do. Ordinarily, Sam loved the soda shop. He and Matt had spent many great sunny afternoons there, sitting on the patio, guy watching and laughing, even occasionally sharing a lemon Italian Cream Soda.

The bitter cold wind cut through the thick wool of his coat, and Sam caught himself wondering if Matt had had the sense to wear a jacket when he left the apartment that morning. Probably not. The sun had been shining then, and Matt never could see beyond the moment.

Someone, possibly even Matt himself, had put a colorful knitted ski cap on the head of the old stone lion that guarded the occult book shop next door to the soda shop. The lilting notes of a sexy little jazz number drifted from the tiny bar on the other side of the soda shop. The music and the light from the window created a perfect backdrop for the vision that met Sam’s eyes when he looked up. In the golden glow from the soda shop window, he saw Matt sitting at a tiny table for two on the front patio of the shop. He wore a thin leather jacket and Sam’s navy blue wool beanie tugged down low over his ears as he sat on the tiny black iron chair. His booted feet rested on the other seat. Matt puffed on one of the little clove cigarettes he favored and cupped hands covered in fingerless gloves around the tiny source of heat. The little table in front of him held an ashtray and two steaming mugs of hot chocolate into which the slushy snow fell.

Sam shook his head. Smoking cloves was bad enough, better than tobacco scent-wise by a small margin, but who the hell sat on the patio in this freaking weather? Airheaded art majors, that was who. “God damn it, Matt! How many times have I told you to dress warmly when you leave the house? You’re going to get sick! And…” The words spilled from his mouth before he could stop them, a ludicrous tirade that his own mother would have cringed to hear. He snatched the cigarette out of his roommate’s hand. “Smoking this shit will kill you!”

Matt turned to look at him, and Sam nearly groaned. The heavy feeling in his heart, the anger at Matt’s foolishness, seemed to melt away as he caught the expression in those bright blue eyes. He wasn’t surprised to find his own heart beating faster, stirring with desire despite the cold. He was surprised by the lilt of happiness that brightened the gray of the late winter day. Fuck. He didn’t want to feel this way, to let anyone have the ability to create sunshine in his day with a crooked little smile. Especially not Matt. Matt drifted along perfectly content, dreaming and painting and starving for his art. Sam dreamed of bigger things. He wanted success, the bright lights of a big city, and by big he didn’t mean Denver! He wanted all the luxuries life could afford. And that look in Matt’s eyes… had he always looked at him that way?

Matt removed his boots from the seat with a grimace.

“No, thanks. I’ll pass. Look. I’m going home this weekend.” He hadn’t planned to, but a weekend in Denver with his mom and dad, siblings running all over, would screw his head back on straight. “You keep the rent money. Use it to find another place to stay, okay? I can’t keep doing this every month.”

Matt protested instantly, the shock on his face heart-wrenching. “Sam, I promise. It won’t happen again. I got a job. That’s why I couldn’t come to the apartment.”

Sam shook his head, schooling his features to hide his feelings. “No. It’s just not working out for us.” But it could, his heart argued. He shut it down instantly. Not taking that chance. Better to end things now, before either of them got any more involved and while they both still had the chance to make their dreams come true.

“Sam, I love you. I don’t want to move out. Just, please, give me one more month to prove I can do this?” Matt’s voice cracked on the words he forced out. Sam couldn’t tell if tears or melting snowflakes caused the dampness on his pale cheeks.

Hardening his heart, Sam continued, “That’s just it, Matt. I don’t want to be loved. I don’t want to love anyone. I just wanted to get laid a little. I need freedom to pursue my dreams, and taking care of you, it’s a burden I don’t want. I thought it was all just fun. You’re taking things way too seriously. So, please, do us both a favor and leave before I get back Monday afternoon?” His dad would lend him the money for the rent this month.

Unable to meet those blue eyes without throwing his arms around Matt’s slim shoulders and hugging him tight, without promising that they could try again, without swearing he would never be such an ass again, Sam turned and stumbled against the stone lion, knocking the knit cap into the slush, where eddies of muddy liquid blurred its bright colors. He whirled and tromped back up the street he’d just come down, ignoring Matt calling his name behind him as he went.

New Blurb For Upcoming Release: The Old Soda Shop

The Old Soda Shop 

At All Romance eBooks! 

Former college roommates Matt and Sam have a history.

Will a chance encounter in the street lead to a second chance at love?

Years ago, art student Matt Gilray's world turned on its axis when his lover Sam rejected him at their favorite hangout. He'd spent the years since learning to be a businessman and an artist, letting go, forgetting a love affair that had brought him more pain than joy in the end.

A last minute realization that his college fuck buddy had turned into a lover wasn’t enough to stop business student Sam Balantyne from chasing his dreams. When the dreams runs out, Sam returns home and buys the derelict soda shop where they used to hang out. He wasn't looking for a second chance; he just wanted to enjoy a memory.

In the process of “freeing himself to pursue his dreams”, had Sam tarnished them beyond recovery?